Friday, March 14, 2008

Missing Someone is pretty hard to bear ...

As much as I dun like to admit, I really miss LianJing Fashi.

How frequent can you find such an approachable old monk who really cares for people around him and treats you as if you are his son/daughter ? This personal touch has left many of us speaking fondly of him even for months after he has left Singapore.

There are times when fellow dharma friends from my Buddhist Society will joke that he is my god-father. Though I told them that is not the case, I really do wish I have a god-father like him and to come under his tutelage. It's so rare in life to find a mentor who makes you want to be a better person instinctively by just being around him and listening to his words of wisdom.

I wonder how he is faring now that he's in Panama leading a group of cultivators in meditation. My relief comes from knowing that I will be meeting him soon in Taiwan for a retreat up in one of the mountains in Tainan in May.

Fashi reminds me of my grandpa.

I see some resemblence between them both.

I see humility and kindness ...

Traits which I have been trying to cultivate... .

I've been missing my grandpa lately too ... though we have never been very close during my teens, I remember he used to dote on me when I was young. I even taught him to read a few English words using my cousins' Primary 2 textbook ! That's how hardworking he is before he left us after succumbing to colon cancer. I never cried so hard in my life. For a few years I cant even bring myself to recall without dropping tears, those days he will sit quietly at the mahjong table playing a game or two with my uncles & aunties or sitting on the sofa catching up on his reading.

It's that quiet demeanour that I miss most... if only my grandpa is still alive ... if only ...

Tibetan Nun ~ Om Mani Padme Hom 11:55 PM